httpvhd://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSG_ntwkB98

Hello, Culinary Playmates:

It is I, Helenka, your fearless advocate of gustatory creativity (aka I eat weird but really tasty food and think you should, too). However, in order to eat weird food, you actually have to have food. What a concept! What’s for dinner? Well, when I arrived at Brian’s, the answer was obviously … nothing. ::is shocked not to mention hungry:: The kitchen counter was bare, save for the soap dispenser and small potted palm. Can’t eat either of those, can we? No cookbook, either. So I made Brian scale the heights to delve into his cupboards, then back down into his fridge and freezer. It was a clear case of WYSIWYG. Recipe? Who needs a recipe when you have an imagination? Well, obviously that and a few odd ingredients.

What we got was a can of hearty smoked bacon clam chowder soup that was filled with more … stuff such as bacon, smoked oysters, petits pois, then flavoured with freshly ground black pepper and cayenne pepper before being ladled out onto half a chive and cheddar scone and topped with the other half. It was terrific: spicy and filling, so that I finally got over the fact that Brian’s cupboard was bereft of the canned tuna I wanted to include. Oh, well. I survived that oh-so-tragic moment (NOT), but I’m sure I’ll end up making my own version and include that added layer of flavour and texture. If you know me at all by now, then you’ll recognize those two important buzzwords in my vocabulary.

Brian did wonder whether or not we were cheating. But I recognized that it’s not always easy to have fresh food in the fridge or out on the counter and, in fact, given the uncertainty of the weather especially in winter, it’s crucial that everybody stock up with at least some canned and frozen foods. Because, if there’s a snowstorm, I doubt you’ll be able to get a pizza delivered. 30 minutes or it’s free might end up being 3 hours or it’s free! And, by then, you may have been chewing on ice cubes as the only ingredient of any substance in your freezer. ::shudders and not only from the chill:: Yuck!

At least with the inclusion of a prepared soup as a base that is then filled with other ingredients, you can cut down on the level of sodium and other preservatives (that often make even the best quality of soup taste … uh … like cans). If you have an open bottle of wine, you can pour in a couple of spoons just prior to serving. Then you can be sure it won’t taste anything like a commercially prepared soup. If not wine, then port or brandy. Or a dry sherry. Just about anything as long as it isn’t too sweet. I’ve even made a soup with vodka. [But, then, remember I not only eat weird things, I also drink them, too! And it was a real recipe for Bloody Mary Tomato Soup from a fancy Toronto hotel.]

In any case, if it’s been some time since you’ve climbed your own stepstool to see what’s in your cupboards, you might want to have a look-see. If the cupboard’s pretty bare, lay in some provisions. So you’re not caught short (as Brian was with the yes-I’m-going-to-mention-it-again missing tuna), it might be a good idea to keep a list of foods taped to the inside of the cupboard; when you use a few things up, then you’ll know what you need to replace. Besides canned soups, there’s tuna, ham, seafood, chopped tomatoes. And on and on. Brian and I both like frozen petits pois (baby peas). The quality is far superior to that of mature peas (that seem to be nothing but starch in a shell, frankly). You could buy frozen julienned carrots (much nicer than those boring circles) or a frozen stir-fry mix (they may say Chinese, Thai or Japanese, etc. on the package). Plus, nobody should be without at least a couple packages of dry pasta which, when cooked, can be dressed with a drizzle of olive oil, herbs, sliced black olives and grated parmesan. You don’t need to always go the meat sauce route.

Usually, most dried soups have tons of sodium and that’s not a good thing. But, recently, I’ve found a line of organic dried soups (all you need to add is boiling water) that are full of fibre and nutrition. You may want to take a look around to see what’s available in your supermarket or health food store. Of course, a jar of peanut butter and crackers or a jar of your favourite jam and frozen bagels that will be toasted in a twinkle are terrific comfort foods, too. [Reminder to self: Self, you need to pick up marmalade this week! And I did, with extra-oranges!]

You’ll note that I’ve concentrated far more on foods that are canned or preserved (in glass jars). Why? Well, if your freezer is stuffed to the gills and a storm or other emergency leaves you with a power outage for a significant length of time, you’re going to have a lot of food to throw out. But, then, you’d be unable to cook it unless you have a gas stove, a gas BBQ or even an old-fashioned fondue set. Okay, so I won’t focus on the loss of electricity. Let’s stay positive.

The only place where I don’t follow the advice of the experts is that I can’t stand the taste of powdered milk, so I personally don’t stock that. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t keep a couple of hunks of a good hard cheese in your freezer. And you may be drinking your coffee or tea with sugar or honey only. But that’s only a temporary deprivation.

Variations:
Brian brought up the possibility of starting off with a can of cream of tomato soup instead. Don’t you think that would taste much more lively with the addition of fresh basil (if you have it, otherwise dried), plum tomato chunks and a can of green chilies? If you didn’t know it, you wouldn’t guess that this started off as something you might have had for lunch as a kid along with a cheese sandwich.

Getting back to our smoky bacon clam chowder to which I really wanted to add tuna [and I can hear Brian grumbling for me to stop repeating myself; hmmm, maybe he’ll get some tuna for next time?], if you don’t have tuna, but you have any of the following, they would be a terrific substitute: leftover shredded rotisserie chicken, chopped ham or turkey breast, shredded cheese. If you’re really stuck for filler, then just use a good bread. Since the weather’s finally turned colder and damp, I’ve been enjoying the line of frozen soups that I have but turn into meals by dropping in a slice of Bavarian multigrain rye (my favouritest bread ever) that has been torn into rough pieces. The bread soaks up some of the liquid and gives you something chewy to play with in your mouth.

Helenka’s Really, Really Nostalgic Meanderings:
Now we’re going waaaaaaay back to my childhood (not only last century but also last milenium). I remember one memorable time when there were live chickens in the basement. Thankfully that experiment wasn’t repeated after the first time. But the basement was the location of much other more fascinating stuff. Such as making home-made wine. ::giggles:: Did I mention that – at least in those days – it was natural for kids from European families to have a little alcohol with meals?

But, okay, that’s just a preamble. What I wanted to talk about was the art of home preserving and pickling. When I was young, we would regularly go to friends’ farms to pick our own fruits and veggies. Both farms were in Scarborough. Of course, when I was a child, it was an adventure to get there. I remember when the Gardiner Expressway first opened and there we were – just like the Jetsons – on an optimistic highway to the future. At one friend’s farm, we’d pick strawberries, raspberries and red currants. [That’s the farm where my childhood friend and I played at being Lawrence of Arabia and Sharif Ali at the well where we’d … uh … ridden our pretend “camels”.] These fruits would all get turned into luscious jams. At another friend’s farm, we’d get tomatoes and pickling cucumbers. The tomatoes were turned into what was called “chili sauce” in the Polish community, though it was really just a tomato, celery and onion relish. Really yummy with lots of foods. And, of course, you can’t be authentically Polish without experiencing dill pickles. Though, occasionally, we’d buy a can of pickles from Poland and I was intrigued to see that turmeric was added to the list of pickling spices.

If we drove in the opposite direction to Stoney Creek, we’d end up getting peaches and grapes. I believe there may be a picture of me, 8 years old, wearing shortish pants and a plaid shirt, up in a tree. But I have it hidden in my storage locker, so it’s unlikely to be used as blackmail material, lol (or not).

So, let’s return back to the basement where we had a cold cellar. It was a room carved out from the earth surrounding it. The lower part of it was only as wide as the door. At waist-height, the bricks formed receding steps. And each step on all three sides was covered by bottles and jars, their jewel-bright colours gleaming. The jams and “chiili sauces” were in traditional small mason jars (oh, I remember those fiddly rubbers); the peach halves in taller jars; the pickles in enormous rectangular jars, filled with tall fronds of dill with cloves of garlic; and a few bottles of wine. It was our own treasure cave. In some ways, I could hardly wait for the cucumbers to finish getting pickled because I wanted to eat them so badly. It’s no wonder that I prefer new dills instead of full sours. [That cold cellar also played another role in my imagination, where I pretended it was the entrance to a Phantom of the Opera like cavern and I had been kidnapped from royalty and brought to Toronto. Well, I keep telling you I have an imagination. You should expect such tales from me by now.] But … enough of my even weirder childhood, though it’s fun to visit from time to time. And, in 3-2-1, we’re back to the present.

Well, that’s a wrap for another (now colder) fall episode for 2011. Until next time, have yourselves a great week and don’t forget to have fun with your food, too!

Enjoy!
B&H =;)